Okay ya’ll, as I mentioned in the previous post, no one will ever be able to replace the ‘Dream Team’ that was Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell. At first, I wished they had chosen: Mariah Carey [for the crazy factor] and Harry Connick Jr [for the hotness and humor factor] as the new judges. However, I was very interested in seeing exactly how Jennifer Lopez, Steven Tyler, and Randy Jackson would interact with each other. I found myself curious to find out which judge would ‘Bring The Crazy’ which judge would ‘Be Too Nice’ and finally who would end up assuming the ‘Brutally Honest’ role. Because SOMEONE has to crush the dreams of the deranged and delusional. Right?
Well, I watched the Season Premiere, and my questions have been answered!
* Please be forewarned. If you did not see the show, and you do NOT want to know what happened until after you can watch it online, or on your DVR, then I suggest you do NOT read any further. *
If you DID see the show, and you’re ready to discuss all the glory that is the Season Premiere, you’ve come to the right place! And what could be better than STARTING the show in my ‘Home State’? Nothing.
Welcome, to the New Jersey Auditions! This is American Idol
From the moment I saw Jennifer Lopez, I was totally and completely consumed by her stunning beauty, and her incredibly perfect hair. She is simply fabulous. Steven Tyler has seen some better days, his face looks like he may have had a little too much work done, and he’s not aging very gracefully. But don’t get me wrong people. I still love Steven Tyler, and I will always love all things Aerosmith. As for Randy Jackson, well, let’s just say I was just happy to see his familiar face.
The first audition was from a seemingly timid girl, Rachel, who was also once a contestant on Season Six, but she was cut the first day in Hollywood. And now she was back to try again. She didn’t deliver a spectacular performance, but that might have been due to the fact that her idol, Jennifer Lopez, remembered Rachel from the earlier season. I think that definitely threw her off. Rachel’s audition was a very nice way to kick off the show.
Next up, Caleb, a young man from somewhere in New York took to the stage. He was singing a song, and it was all kinds of catchy, but in the middle of his audition, it became very clear that Steven Tyler would be the judge ‘Bringing The Crazy’ this season. Steven was so excited by Caleb’s singing, he started howling and banging the table with his hands. He just might be able to fill Paula Abdul’s shoes.
15 year old, Kenzie, was up next with a beautiful smile and a working set of pipes. She was also the third contestant in a row to make it to Hollywood. I started to wonder if they would ever ‘reject’ a contestant and where were the psychos?
And that’s precisely when the very first tone-deaf person arrived on the set. Jennifer Lopez looked as if she wanted to drop dead, after she had to say, “NO!” for the first time. She was literally cringing with discomfort. It was painfully obvious Jennifer did not like being put in the position of power that could make or break a person’s whole life. Just when I thought JLo was going to start crying, the next contestant came into audition.
Tiffany, from Morris NJ, had a total full-blown-meltdown the first time she saw Jennifer Lopez. Oh, and did I mention she’s at least half a crazy person. I mean when she popped open her jacket in the midst of her shtick, she looked ridiculous with the stars pasted on her boobies. That? Was um, how you say – so very wrong. But, then she collected herself, and auditioned again, and seriously. And as much as I hate to admit this? I think she did a pretty good job. But I certainly don’t think she’s the next American Idol.
The next contestant to audition was another 16 year old. A young man, who used to be confined to a wheelchair when he was a small child. Or something like that. I tried to listen to his story but I was too distracted, by his gigantic nose. Nevertheless, Robbie Rosen totally rocked singing the song ‘Yesterday’ by the ‘Beatles’. He took his time with each note and executed amazing voice control. His performance was spot-on. And he’s pretty awesome. I’m a fan.
After a string of completely awful singers, and watching Jennifer Lopez squirm in her chair with every ‘NO’ she delivered, finally, finally, finally, the deranged and delusional came out of the woodwork. This is the part of the opening auditions that I really look forward to watching.
There was the ‘Boyscout Boy’ who’s name may or may not have been Chris that showed up in an outfit that looked as if he’d just returned from fishing. He’s audition was an epic failure. And his bangs are just shameful.
Then, there was ‘The Guy Who Probably Ate Paint Chips As A Child’ that totally freaked me out with his serial killer glasses way before he ever even opened his mouth to sing a note.
And then? Something really interesting happened.
A ‘Stage Five Weirdo’ and ‘Extreme Britney Spears Enthusiast’ [who may or may not be a meth-addict] named, Ashley, brought her ‘A Game’ with an extra dose of total insanity. However, in a shocking turn of events, she can ‘kind of’ sing. And by that I mean if she was Ethel Merman, on Broadway. In another shocking turn of events, Ashley managed to win over Jennifer Lopez. But not just because Jennifer couldn’t say, NO, but because Ashley actually made a lucid point when she stated she thinks ‘Pop Music’ really needs to change. She said something along the lines of Pop Music meets Liza Minnelli but the way she said it actually made sense. I think Steven decided to put her through because let’s be honest, crazy loves other crazies. Ashley is definitely going to be a train wreck to watch during Hollywood Week. I am VERY curious to see how far she’s going to make it in the competition.
Next up? Another 16 year old, named Victoria. With her white smile and southern drawl she was just as adorable as she was annoying. However, she managed to win over Randy when she suddenly dropped her accent and threw him a ‘Yo, Yo, Dawg’ complete with Gansta hand gestures.
The last contestant was a War Refugee from Kosovo. Her name is Melinda. I was taken a back by her pretty looks, I was moved by her family history and the story surrounding the way they fled their country, and, her singing voice was pretty good.
20 year old Deyvin started things off. She works in NYC as a singing waitress. She gave a very nice plug for her boss, but I wasn’t expecting very much from her. However, she actually delivered a very good performance. She did NOT do that screaming thing that other try-outs do. I really liked that she got a golden ticket, and that she was older than 16 years old. I’m going to be keeping my eye on her throughout the competition. She has real potential.
To conceal the sounds emanating from the next contestant, the judges all sang, ‘I’m A Believer’ by the ‘Monkeys’ and I truly enjoyed watching the three of them interact on that level. That was fun. And, on ‘Day Two’ they didn’t waste ANY time bringing out the clearly disturbed.
Yo-Gee-Pop, a 25 year old, Japanese man, claimed and believed that he entertained Michael Jackson while in the womb. And then he brought ‘A Party In The USA’ by kicking off series of crazies and bad singers. After many, many, many, bad performances, Jennifer Lopez was finally able to say ‘NO’ and without squirming! I guess all she needed was a little breaking-in.
Once again, another 16 year old auditioned. Her name is Brielle and she’s daddy’s little girl. When her father was diagnosed with throat cancer, her singing was one of the things that kept him going, and fighting for his life. I was expecting an enormous voice, or something that would give me the chills to come out of her mouth. But, I think she just did ‘Okay’. She is a very sweet girl, and I love how close she is with her father, but she’s lacking ‘Star Quality.’ I sincerely hope she can harness her voice a little better when she gets to Hollywood
Lastly, a young man named Travis auditioned. And guess how old he is? If you said 16, you would be correct. Travis has a twin brother and they were stuck living in a homeless shelter in the Bronx, NY. He has one of those heartfelt stories that made Ryan Seacrest buckle at the knee. Jennifer saw Ryan wipe a tear from his own cheek. At first Travis sang ‘Eleanor Rigby’ by the ‘Beatles’ and it was lovely, but when he sang the second song, he really unleashed. He definitely has the ‘IT FACTOR’. And, he can definitely hold a note. The boy has some real promise. And talent. He was my FAVORITE of the night.
All in all, it was very exciting.
51 contestants from the New Jersey Auditions made it to Hollywood.
Who was YOUR favorite contestant?
What do YOU think of the new judges?
Will YOU watch the rest of the season?
*The comments are now open.*